Muddled Musings
Never know what you might find...

Thursday, September 18, 2003  

I get lonely. Last night I played at a concert at the town hall. I rang my boyfriend and talked to him, I was so depressed I cried. I just want to go home. I am homesick. I hate it.

posted by Sarah | 8:36:00 PM

Wednesday, September 17, 2003  

There are 8 weeks left. Or not even 8 weeks. I have more things to organise right now than I have had in the entire year. Yet I feel suprisingly in control. I am going home for the next two weeks, to see Mark and my family. Where people actually care about me. I have had enough of my house. I have been asked to move out, again, this time for real, no going back. Its just that we are two different people. That and I don't think she really likes me. Good thing I had already decided, or I would have been offended. Ha.
At least I am making friends now. I still get lonely, but Anette has been great. I have waited for other people to call me, but they are too busy for me now - have too many other friends. When those people arent around, then they will want to talk to me and see how i am and what I have been doing. it makes me sad, because i miss you, and you're not there for me any more. I though we would keep in touch. I go past where you live every day...i doubt i'll forget about it when i am home, and things will turn out to be the same as they always were. I wouldn't like to grow away from you though.

I'm going to try to go to Austria. The idea of it is really exciting. The chance to live one of my long long dreams is actually possible. Not just something to wonder about and something that happens to other people. it doesn't seem real, like not something that should be possible for a country girl like me. I have no concept of what it would feel like to BE in another country. I can go for a year if i want. A whole year! And the best bit is i get to take mark with me. I think maybe 6 months would be long enough. But then again the opportunity is there, are the mid semester break would be the chance to travel. once i make it to Austria it is a short trip to get to another country.

posted by Sarah | 7:53:00 PM